Every Father Knows & Cares…

Posted on November 15, 2007 in: Holiday, Life, Spirituality, Suffering

Now, some are lost in shopping malls and some on battlefields
some are lost in suburbs…and some on capitol hill
some are lost on terminal wards…or in a nursing home
some are equally as lost between their headphones
but whatever your co-ordinates on your map of shame
whether close or far away…we’re all lost just the same

and that Birth of Births was like a death
under that hallowed star
still every father knows and cares
where his sons and daughters are

you may wake up a bit confused with the ache that’s in your heart
doesn’t matter if you get there by choice or got there by default
every birth shall come with tears and with youth there comes a cost
Jesus, what’s it like to grow up in the shadow of a cross?
where you take on more than you could know
and more than i’d ever wanna say
i put you there a long time ago
and i do it everyday

and that Birth of Births was like a death
under that hallowed star
still every father knows and cares
where his sons and daughters are” ~Bill Mallonee © 2005

It’s been an interesting couple of weeks to be sure. The weather here in NapTown has gone from a pleasant 65 degrees and blue skies to the more seasonal 45 degrees complete with the usual Novemberish ceiling of gray. In one word - oppressive. The skies seem to mimic what’s happening in my own life as well.

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Down the Path - God Will Be Guiding Me

Posted on November 2, 2007 in: Life, Spirituality

Down the Path

Savannah 2007

…I may always feel looking back on any past sin that in the very heart of my evil passion there was something that God approves and wants me to feel not less but more. Take a sin of lust. The overwhelming thirst for rapture was good and even divine; it has not got to be unsaid (so to speak) and recanted. But it will never be quenched as I tried to quench it. If I refrain…God will be guiding me as quickly as He can to where I shall get what I really wanted all the time. It will not be very like what I now think I want; but it will be more like it than some suppose. In any case it will be the real thing, not a consolation prize or substitute. If I had it I should not need to fight against sensuality as something impure; rather I should spontaneously turn away from it as something dull, cold, abstract, and artificial…

When we are tempted, we must remember that just because God wants for us what we really want and knows the only way to get it, therefore He must, in a sense, be quite ruthless towards sin… The more He loves you the more determined He must be to pull you back from your way which leads nowhere, into His way which leads you where you want to go… You may go the wrong way again, and again He may forgive you…but there is no hope in the end of getting where you want to go except by going God’s way…” ~C.S. Lewis

So, after a few months it’s time for another posting in the “Down the Path” series. The quote from Lewis (above) is one of my most favorite and one that has had a significant impact in my life. I was reminded of it after a difficult talk with an old friend yesterday, albeit one that ended well. The crux of our conversation was about desire, selfishness, longing, and the difficult task of finding our way in the world. It was good to catch up and to simply listen. As I mentioned in my last post it seems that life often just picks up speed and spins us around, and things move so quickly that we rarely stop and take the time to reflect on all that’s happened, or to catch up with old friends. There can quickly become a chasm of things unsaid, and that’s the real sadness of it all.
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There Is No Shadow Of Turning

Posted on October 23, 2007 in: Life, Spirituality

No Shadow of Turning

Sunrise Over Santa Barbara

“Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.” ~James 1:17

“What seem our worst prayers may really be, in God’s eyes, our best. Those, I mean, which are least supported by devotional feeling. For these may come from a deeper level than feeling. God sometimes seems to speak to us most intimately when he catches us, as it were, off our guard.” ~C.S. Lewis

“Don’t be worried on account of the wicked; don’t be jealous of those who do wrong. They will soon disappear like grass that dries up; they will die like plants that wither. Trust in the Lord and do good; live in the land and be safe. Seek your happiness in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desire. Give yourself to the Lord; trust in him, and he will help you; he will make your righteousness shine like the noonday sun. Be patient and wait for the Lord to act; don’t be worried about those who prosper or those who succeed in their evil plans. Don’t give in to worry or anger; it only leads to trouble.” ~Psalm 37:1-8

“…I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. Which of you fathers, if your son asks for a fish, will give him a snake instead? Or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!”" ~Luke 11:9-13

Well, it’s been an interesting few weeks to be sure. After a very busy post-camp season, a trip to Virgina to see Chief Tim, a visit to The Jewett’s, and other general comings and goings, my wife and I were finally getting geared up for our annual trip to what I refer to as my “happy place” - Santa Barbara/Carpinteria, CA. Alack and alas but that trip never occurred. As Janna and I were packing for the trip on Wednesday the 3rd and beginning to get excited to fly out early the next morning, I suddenly realized that perhaps the overwhelming pain that was clenching my gut all afternoon might be more than just bad gas.

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